


Freedom is overrated

by atir8891



Series: Prison one-shots [4]
Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Boys In Love, Canon Fill-in, Feelings, M/M, Prison, Some angst, season 10
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-07
Updated: 2019-12-07
Packaged: 2021-02-26 07:53:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21710035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/atir8891/pseuds/atir8891
Summary: Mickey and Ian get ready to say goodbye before Ian is released from prison.
Relationships: Ian Gallagher/Mickey Milkovich
Series: Prison one-shots [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1570444
Comments: 14
Kudos: 98





	Freedom is overrated

**Author's Note:**

> as usual, I just have a lot of feelings.....and this is what came out of my head

They’re laying on their side in the bottom bunk of their cell, intently looking into each other’s eyes. All the squabbling, disagreements and anxieties that led them to mostly keep their distance from each other for weeks now forgotten, as they contemplate the fact that they’re going to be separated soon, who knows for how long exactly. Their eyes are wet, their hands clasped together, their hearts full.

“I don’t wanna go” Ian whispers, looking distraught and broken.

“I know” Mickey says with half a smile. Seeing Ian like this is killing him, even though he feels exactly the same way. But what hurts him the most is having to see his boyfriend in pain. So he tries to put on a brave face as much as he can. “I promise I’ll be with you soon. Ain’t no way I’m spending much longer in this shithole, especially without you around.” He attempts another smile, trying to be reassuring.

“How can you say that for sure, though? You don’t know when you’re gonna be up for parole, it could be months from now!” Ian says, desperation evident in his voice.

Mickey raises his eyebrows and smirks a little. “I got my ways.”

“The fuck does that mean? I don’t want you to put yourself in any more trouble trying to find a faster way out of here!” Ian’s scared now. He knows the lengths Mickey will go to be with him. He knows his boyfriend loses all instincts of self-preservation when it comes to him, and that scares the fuck out of him. He needs him out of prison, all in one piece. He also needs for that to happen soon, but not if there’s any risks involved.

“Relax, I’m not gonna do anything stupid. I got it covered. Don’t worry about it” Mickey says, rolling his eyes, an air of mock-exasperation barely hiding the adoration he feels for his man. “I can take care of myself, you know” he adds, stroking Ian’s face softly, because he not-so-secretly loves when his boyfriend gets so protective of him.

Ian nods curtly, his lover’s touch doing wonders to calm his nerves immediately. “I know. Just like I can take care of myself too. But we also take care of each other” he says, almost solemnly, choking on his emotions a little.

Mickey feels a swell of emotions too, remembering how he had tried to make Ian understand that the basis of their love was taking care of each other, back when Ian was having trouble accepting his diagnosis and had ended up pushing him away as a result. It seems like a lifetime ago now, and yet it’s part of what they had to go through during all those years to get to this moment. This moment where they’re almost home free. Mickey had thought they were one step away from the finish line when they were standing at the Mexican border, but that hadn’t turned out to be the case. It was another necessary step in their journey, but it could never be their happy ending. Now, though, now that they’re both close to being released from prison, they’ll be able for the first time in years, maybe for the first time ever, to have a real chance at a happy, bullshit-free, committed relationship out there in the real world. Mickey can’t fucking wait. He actually feels giddy at the prospect. But he knows Ian’s not quite there yet. He’s unaware of Mickey’s failsafe plan and so he’s wallowing in gloomy thoughts, focusing on the fact they’ll be separated soon, not knowing for how long.

Ian’s looking down, lost in his thoughts, but Mickey ducks his head and catches his eyes. “Hey. It’s gonna be fine. We’re gonna be fucking fine. We’ve been through worse shit, you and me, don’t you think?”, he tries a smile that grows bigger once he sees Ian nod and smile a little in return. “I know it’s gonna be fucking hard, hell, bein’ away from you always feel like losin’ a fucking limb, so I know it ain’t gonna be easy. But try to focus on the good stuff, alright? Bein’ out of here, being fucking free, seeing your family an’ all the little ones. All that shit.” Mickey’s full on grinning now, just thinking of the big stupid smile on Ian’s face when he’s going to be reunited with his siblings, his niece and new nephew.

Ian’s smile is still only a tentative one, though. “Yeah” he breathes, not sounding fully convinced. “Being free, huh? Well, freedom’s overrated anyway.” He smiles a little more, a thought popping into his head. “You know, when you first showed up in this cell, and you told me you’d given up your freedom to be here with me… I was obviously over the fucking moon but I didn’t want that for you. I thought you’d made the biggest mistake of your life and I felt like I was taking away your freedom again, just by being dumb enough to get myself locked up.” Ian sees Mickey opening his mouth to speak, but he needs to say this, so he stops him by gently cupping his face in his hands, stroking his cheekbones. “I don’t think like that anymore. I mean, I do a bit, obviously, but I also understand why you did it. I was selfish for so long, Mick, but maybe I’m a bit better now, ‘cause I realize that I’d do the same for you, in a fucking heartbeat. I’d give up my freedom if it meant being with you, keeping you safe, taking care of you. Being without you all those years made me realize that… freedom isn’t worth shit if I can’t enjoy it with you.”

Mickey feels tears forming in his eyes, the emotion too much for him to deny any longer. He didn’t know he needed to hear those words from Ian, yet they seem to be like some medicine he needed to heal a remote part of himself he had kept locked away for a long time. And there’s no way he could doubt Ian’s words, even if his tone wasn’t so painfully sincere to be heartbreaking. Because his boyfriend had been literally moments away from stabbing a guy to throw his parole hearing a couple weeks ago and would’ve succeeded in giving up his freedom for Mickey if he hadn’t stopped him. But then again it seemed they were in a habit of doing stupid shit for each other, regardless of the consequences for themselves, and always trying to save the other from doing something they might regret. He just hopes that life won’t force them to do stupid shit anymore and that they can soon go back to taking care of each other, when they’ll finally be out of prison together.

With tears now streaming down his face, Mickey reaches for Ian and kisses him firmly on the lips. The redhead melts into the kiss instantly, pulling his man closer and letting the intimate contact between their bodies soothe him. He knows Mickey’s right. He needs to be strong and think positive thoughts. So he thinks of hearing his voice when he calls him from prison, seeing him when he comes to visit him, and finally being able to hold him again when he too will be released from the joint and they can start spending the rest of their lives together. Together, happy and _free_.

He allows himself to think of the good things, and that’s how he finally smiles into the kiss, feeling himself relax and knowing that Mickey needs this too. His man needs to know that he’s okay, that he’s happy and that he’s going to try and enjoy reuniting with his family. And Ian’s going to do that, even though he won’t be completely at peace until _all_ of his family is with him. Until he can have Mickey back in his arms where he belongs.

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think :)
> 
> my [tumblr](http://sickness-health-all-that-shit.tumblr.com)


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